To you, the reader:
Aloneness is not loneliness.
Since I was 16, I had learnt to embrace solitude. To embrace aloneness. Where there is no other human being than myself and God. Many a time in the past I fervently sought to meet people and spend quality time with them, being countlessly rejected time and again. I was lonely. The more I asked and got rejected, the lonelier I got. Then I decided to give up. Completely. My one true friend would be God alone. He is the One who never forsook me, He is the One who is literally always there for me.
So now if you ask me out, I'd have to think twice if I were willing to give up my alone time for you. Clearly, you cannot be there for me always. You cannot fully understand my joy or my pain. You will not be available for me, not because you are a horrible person, but because here in Singapore you simply have no time to do so. The feeling is mutual. Or perhaps not, considering I used to keep on making time to spend with you but yet got rejected time and again. Now that I have found a consistent source of joy, it is time for you to take a reprieve yourself. Deal with your loneliness. It's a serious problem.
That only God can satisfy completely.
:Joel Kindiak
